Past,Now and Future..

Long time din write blog already..actually i really dunno why i will switch on my laptop and log into my blog..maybe i feel like wanna write out my feeling at here..somehow i really dunno where can i start from..
Recently i had been frustated by a thing which was alr a PAST..i know i shouldn't talk or even think about it..but it doesn't mean that it never happened..i juz can't stop thinking about it..so this few days i had did many things that need to use my brain to do it so that i can stop thinking about that thing..i played mahjong,i sleep,i cooked..but when it's till night,before i sleep,the thing will automically appear..i can't get rid of it..sorry i shouldn't make u cried,but i really do mind it..because i really love you very much..everything u done to him make me feel like i'm far far behind him compared to last time when u love him..you really do listen everything to him and even u'll do everything for him..he had played an important role in your heart before..u told me that this thing can't be comparing..isn't it means that things that u did for him is can't compare with mine?and i'm lesser?i don't know..it getting serious and it almost appear everyday in my mind..when i think of those everything u did for him,i'm jealous..i wonder will you do the same for me if i was him?Past doesn't means never happened,i mind because i really care of you and love you..
Now,i do enjoyed my life now..because i'm happy with it..everyday i could spend my time with my beloved..actually i never beg for anything,even we're at home the whole day i'm still that happy..as long as you are with me..All i need and All i wan is only u r mine and totally mine..i admit i'm a strong owning desire person and i'll never let myself lose..
Future?maybe now i already think of my future..if impossible,i would like to say "our" future..because i hope you will be with me in the future..but future i not dare to make any promise with you..when i'm still mind of your past..hope u could give me some times in the future so that i can get rid or forget about your past..